Short Story

The Danger of NC Revealed

It's good to be sharing this with you.

OK — to demonstrate the risk...

Let's role play for a second. Below, I give the super-short story of "Dave and Lisa" — feel free to swap their names and gender to suit:

So Dave reads for the 10th time the power of the No Contact rule and decides to commit.

Five days later, Lisa pings his phone asking how he is.

"Great," thinks Dave..

"It's working!"

And just as the articles instruct him, he ignores her.

.

.

Fast forward to day 30, Dave finally completes NC and sends Lisa a "happy memory" text.

And he waits…

And he waits some more…..

.

.

Silence.

.

.

Uh oh. Lisa isn't playing. And Dave is now 30 days away from Lisa time-wise, and has no clue what's going on.

Good job, NC rule!

OK —

Now here's what happened from Lisa's perspective:

Day 5: "I wonder how Dave is doing.. I think I'll text him."

[Receives nothing back..]

Lisa's brain: "wow, what a child. He probably is following that lame ‘NC rule' and thinks he can make me miss him or feel I'm missing out.."

"Well, two can play that game!"

(Uh oh, Dave!)

The end.

Hopefully you now see the risk of rigidly following the often parroted "No Contact Rule."

Maybe it isn't so smart to copy what everyone tells you to do?

Hmm.

The problem with NC is that... while it IS a good move for PLENTY of good reasons...

I've noticed there is far too much emphasis made — at least on most websites giving advice — that you must NEVER contact your ex for any reason whatsoever.

(During NC.)

And listen..

I almost give the same advice myself in my private membership program, Second Chance (with caveats — important ones.)

But, what I've found?

There really IS a RISK with how most people do NC (and it is a risk that is entirely unnecessary and completely avoidable.)

And that risk is:

You could easily APPEAR petty, small-minded, or even rude to your ex, if they contact you and you BLANK them.

Make sense?

Worse — if your ex thinks you are doing NC as some "tactic" to "get back at me" with the ultimate goal of winning them back.. then you've really screwed up.

You must NOT let your ex perceive your actions in this way. Does that make sense?

See..

No one likes being played or manipulated.

And so, it doesn't take a genius to see how should your ex perceive you in such a negative frame, you would only be making your position weaker.

Right?

So my advice is simple..

IF your ex contacts you during NC?

Don't ignore that GESTURE.

Yes.. that means "breaking" NC. Yes.. that means replying.

And on that?

The goal here is to acknowledge them. Not to have a deep conversation...

So don't talk about what went wrong with the relationship, or what you'll do different "next time" (etc..) because THAT would be a mistake.

The point is, we must not give your ex ammo to use against you.

It's tricky business this..

So..

Keep it brief.

Summary — Please Read!

To repeat —

The main risk I see right now is people going out of their way to NOT contact their ex, when in reality there WILL be situations where doing that only risks painting you as a "jerk" or similar.

You don't want to do that. It is not going to help you.

(There are exceptions, provisos, and a bunch of conditions a-plenty to consider of course, making NC a potential minefield to navigate.)

Psst... Do You Want to Know if You Have a CHANCE of Getting Your Ex Back?

I’ll give you SEVEN dead giveaway clues your ex wants you back, or is having second thoughts...

Hit the big green button now to find out what these seven clues are, and a whole lot more:

👋 FIND OUT THE CLUES!

My girlfriend and I broke up last week. I followed your instructions and we are back together" — Erick Nelson