Are you still not over your ex? If yes, that likely means you have been battling with the breakup pain for a while now.
And perhaps longer than you feel is appropriate?
I am really sorry if that is true.
Let me just say that it isn’t unusual to struggle with moving on. Even many months after.
In fact, recently I got an email from a lady who wondered why she was still not over her ex, some 5 years later.
In this short article, I will share a single yet powerful tip that will help you move on and get over your ex.
Stuck On Your Ex & Not Moving Forward
I admit it.
I’m a sensitive man.
So it upsets me when I hear my clients have been holding back on life because they were waiting for something to happen.
Especially clients — both men and women — who were not actively dating because:
They are still in love with their ex! And still not over them.
So listen close —
If it has been longer than 6 months or so since your breakup?
It is possible that you have been waiting (passively) for something to happen or to change before you will allow yourself to move on.
I can help!
Let’s look at how —
Get Over Your Ex with The Power of Constraints
There’s a general truism that goes:
If you give yourself all the time in the world to get something done, you’ll never get it done
I am going to be super quick here —
If you are waiting for your feelings to change, or for your ex to come back… and you are not putting at least a time constraint on that?
You might find yourself waiting an awfully long time.
And seeing how life is short. And precious..
This is bad!
Put a time constraint on it.
The deliberate use of constraints is known to help creativity and productivity, sure. But it also helps in getting unstuck from your ex, and in helping you to transition to a life free of the baggage of past.
And you must do this!
Otherwise you are literally wasting your life. Stuck, and waiting.
The Day Your Actions & Life Change… Regardless How You Feel
Action time —
I propose you “draw a line in the sand” and put a time limit on this “wait and see” chapter you’re currently in.
Up for it?
If so, pluck a time limit out the sky…
3 days, 3 weeks, 3 months… whatever “makes sense” and is deemed sufficient for you and your state of mind and situation.
(Just don’t fool yourself with a far away deadline.)
Psst.. it isn’t nearly as important how long this time frame is as you might think it is.
Decide right now how long it’ll be.
Then grab your calendar and write down the date.
This date will be the point of time (in the near future) where you agree to “turn the page” and start a new chapter (the POST ex chapter.)
No ifs or buts.
This is the day where you will no longer put your life on pause waiting for your ex, or hoping for something to change because you “don’t feel like doing anything different.”
This will be the day where you will take different ACTION regardless of whether you “feel like it” or not.
Remember: action inspires feelings just as much as feelings inspire action.
What you are doing here is defining the point in time where your actions will change and be different to what you were doing previously (and currently.)
Like a switch was flipped.
Too many people wait for their feelings to change before they will change (and therefore ACT different.)
Yet science has shown us time and time again that when we take action, we change how we feel.
Therefore you get to change how you feel by changing how you act!
But… seeing how it is easier to stay stuck in the routine already in play, and therefore stuck with the same feelings and still not be over your ex?…
Use the power of constraints “trick” to put a limit on your “wait and see” mode.
Decide to start living the life you would (and taking the action you would) after moving on… regardless of whether you “feel” like it or not, and you will soon experience the feelings of being over your ex.