What if You Bump Into Your Ex During No Contact?

“No-contact” refers to completely cutting off all communication so you can heal and give your ex space. As a result, it is preferable not to run into your ex during this time.

What If You Bump Into Your Ex?

If you bump into your ex during no-contact, your best option is to be diplomatic. Being diplomatic means respecting their boundaries, being polite, and not engaging in conversation beyond a simple greeting. Keeping the conversation brief or redirecting it away from yourself is the most appropriate way to handle the situation. Do not be tempted to explain why you are no longer in contact or try to talk about the issues that led to your breakup. Ultimately, it is best to remain cordial and polite and leave the encounter as quickly as possible.

One of my clients began the no-contact rule two weeks ago and shared his experience with me:

Crazy thing happened! I met my ex in public by accident. A true chance-meeting kind of thing (argh!) and I nearly went to pieces. But then I remembered your advice to just be diplomatic and polite…

I said hello with a smile. Nice and simple. And she definitely looked a bit uncomfortable… yet she stopped and returned the gesture. We then spoke for less than a minute, completely amicable and fine.

I think she was surprised I didn’t try to make anything of it, and I feel sure she will be more open to having a chat with me in the future as a result. All in all, what could have been terrible ended up a success! I said goodbye and then continued on with my day!

If you come face-to-face with each other, you don’t have to perform miracles or say anything amazing. This needn’t be complicated! Just keep the conversation simple and move on with your day.


It is not always possible to avoid your ex. If you bump into your ex during no-contact, the safest option is diplomacy. This is not the time to discuss the breakup or air your feelings. Be cordial and look to remove yourself from the encounter as quickly as possible.

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About the author: i’m a relationship coach specialising in breakup recovery. i’ve been doing this for 12+ years helping thousands worldwide. i created the Breakup Dojo, a popular program with over 1,000 members. i’ve authored several in-demand breakup recovery products, drawing from my deep fascination with psychology. i also publish the “ex-communication” newsletter that’s packed with actionable advice to over 10,000 subscribers worldwide.