How to Keep Your Ex Interested?

You’re probably wondering if it’s possible to keep your ex interested. Like trying to nail jelly to a tree, right? Wrong. While it may seem as tricky as a game of 3D chess, with the right moves, you can indeed capture their attention. Let’s look at how…

Step 1: Live Your Best Life

You only have one life, so make it count! As cliché as it sounds, living your best life will magnetically draw people towards you, including your ex. Be as captivating as the protagonist of a gripping novel.

To do this:

  • Pursue your passions
  • Hone your skills
  • Travel and meet new people
  • Stay healthy physically and mentally

For instance, take Sue. After her breakup, Sue trained to run a marathon. Her determination and newfound love for health attracted the attention of many, including her ex. She didn’t just run the marathon; she ran her life, too.

Step 2: Cultivate Independence

You’ve got to be like a cat — enjoy companionship but be comfortable alone. This independence can be as irresistible as a well-aged wine.

So how do you do it? 👇

  • Develop self-reliance: Learn to enjoy your own company
  • Pursue individual interests: Have hobbies outside of your common interests
  • Maintain a solid friend circle: Don’t rely solely on your ex for social interaction

Consider our friend Mike. After parting ways with his girlfriend, he invested in his self-reliance, took up hiking, and expanded his social circles. His ex couldn’t help but admire his newfound self-assurance and independence. 

Step 3: Show Growth

Show them you’re like fine wine, getting better with time. Showcase your growth, and they’ll be left wondering what changed.

Consider these pointers:

  • Address your flaws: No one’s perfect, but efforts to improve never go unnoticed
  • Learn from the past: Show them you’ve taken lessons from the relationship
  • Demonstrate emotional maturity: Handle interactions with calmness and clarity

Step 4: Maintain Good Communication

Good communication is the key that can unlock even the most jammed door. It’s all about balance, though. Don’t flood them with messages, but don’t become a ghost either.

Here are some tips:

  • Be respectful: Respect their space and time
  • Keep it light: Avoid serious or contentious topics
  • Be genuine: Sincerity is the best policy

Think about Amy. She struck the perfect balance in her communication with her ex. Respectful, lighthearted, and genuine, her interactions left her ex more intrigued than ever. 

Step 5: Set Boundaries

Setting boundaries doesn’t mean building a fortress around you. It’s about creating a healthy space for both of you.

Remember these:

  • Don’t be too available: Your time is valuable
  • No dredging up the past: Avoid rehashing old arguments 
  • Don’t rush things: Good things take time

Step 6: Be Supportive

Just because you’re not together doesn’t mean you can’t be there for them. A little support can go a long way.

Consider these:

  • Be empathetic: Show understanding and care
  • Celebrate their success: Be genuinely happy for them
  • Lend an ear: Sometimes, all they need is someone to listen

For example, when Jake’s ex-girlfriend achieved her dream of opening a bakery, he sent her a heartfelt congratulations message. This small gesture of support made her appreciate him even more.

Step 7: Stay Positive

Remember, you’re a lighthouse, not a storm. Maintain a positive outlook, and it will shine through your interactions.

To stay positive:

  • Practice gratitude: Be thankful for what you have
  • Focus on the good: Talk about positive experiences 
  • Stay hopeful: Keep faith in the future

Summary: Keeping an ex interested isn’t about playing mind games. It’s about being a better version of you. As they say, you can’t control others’ actions, only your own. So, focus on being your most irresistible self, and let everything else fall into place. Cheers to the journey!

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About the author: i’m a relationship coach specialising in breakup recovery. i’ve been doing this for 12+ years helping thousands worldwide. i created the Breakup Dojo, a popular program with over 1,000 members. i’ve authored several in-demand breakup recovery products, drawing from my deep fascination with psychology. i also publish the “ex-communication” newsletter that’s packed with actionable advice to over 10,000 subscribers worldwide.